An indoor cruise through a series of sets that depict a pirate raid on an island settlement, from bombardment of the fortress to debauchery after the victory. Arguably one of the most influential theme park attractions ever created, the Magic Kingdom’s version retains the elaborate queuing area, grand scale, and detailed scenes that have awed audiences since its debut in Disneyland in 1967.

As one of the theme park’s most popular rides, Pirates is scrutinized and revised often. The successful Pirates of the Caribbean movies have boosted the ride’s popularity, and guests’ demands led to the addition of animatronic figures of the film’s Captain Jack Sparrow and Captain Barbossa in scenes. The latest refresh changes a scene of raiders auctioning off women to an auction of captured townsfolk’s luxury possessions and chickens, led by a gun-wielding female pirate.

The cumulative effect of these additions, however, makes the ride’s narrative confusing and self-contradicting. For example, while you might believe that your boat is floating past these scenes at a specific point in time, the appearance of Jack Sparrow in multiple places means that you’re also in different timelines. And it’s nonsense to believe that these pirates will bombard a town, torture its inhabitants, and pillage everything in sight, but will stop all of that for an auction that determines the correct market price for chickens; the new scene just doesn’t make sense in the context of the rest of the ride.